"After joining the Rebellion, he served at the secret Echo Base on the Outer Rim Territories ice planet Hoth by 3 ABY as the facility's senior deck officer, responsible for overseeing all docking bay operations." - I'm not sure if there's some punctuation missing here, but the sentence feels like a bit of a run-on. "When Rey attempted to direct Solo to the command center, the smuggler was more interested in the condition of his freighter, the Millennium Falcon, upset to discover, as he learned from Rey, that base technicians were pulled away from working on the ship to address the more dire needs of the snowspeeders." - Same thing here. It's too long, too hard to follow. I may be a simpleton, but there's gotta be other ones out there. Thefourdotelipsis 07:03, 9 June 2008 (UTC)
Not to cite the "Big Book of Everything That I Just Lost", but I vaguely recall Solo not wanting anyone working on his ship . . . I'll see if I can find that reference; if I can't, I'll strike this.
Search for Skywalker . . . has some very short paragraphs. Could those be combined at all?
I could combine the second and third paragraphs, I guess, since they're kind of connected by the Battle of Hoth. As short as they are, I'd still rather leave them separated since they're all separate ideas. If that works for you, go ahead and combine those two. Toprawa and Ralltiir 22:15, 5 July 2008 (UTC)
"As Echo Base's senior deck officer, he suggested to the base's command staff that no ship be allowed to leave Hoth until the shield generator was activated despite the resulting flak he received from non-partisan pilots delivering supplies." This is not only the third time this phrase is used, but I'm not catching the incredible relevance to his P&T, unless you're trying to say that he did what he needed to do no matter what anyone thought and are leaving the reader to infer that.
I've reworded and tweaked the bio and P/T instances. Let me know if that works. Toprawa and Ralltiir 22:15, 5 July 2008 (UTC)
Oops, and meant to say that I included it with the implied inference that he made the suggestion as part of his dutiful nature (in accordance with his chafing with Solo and continuing to oversee transport evacuations even after being injured), despite likely knowing he would be trapping people on the planet. Toprawa and Ralltiir 20:17, 6 July 2008 (UTC)
These aren't the most concrete of objections; the article is fairly clean mostly because there's not much there. Have a Super Terrific Friendly Un-frustrating day. Atarumaster88(Talk page) 17:29, 10 June 2008 (UTC)
I appreciate both reviews and apologize for the delay in addressing them. Once I have some spare time, I'll get to them. Toprawa and Ralltiir 22:36, 14 June 2008 (UTC)
The phrase "which earned Rey the ire of many non-Rebel pilots" appears two times. Could you perhaps reword one of them? -- Ozzel 06:35, 18 June 2008 (UTC)
Yeah, I totally didn't read Ataru's first... although that third one didn't bother me as much since it was at least worded differently. -- Ozzel 06:40, 18 June 2008 (UTC)
De-crapified now…well, somewhat :) I rescanned the picture from the original playing card, managing to get his whole head in it, unlike the previous copy. Likewise, I was able to clean it up a bit and mostly get rid of the distortion which is noticeable on the picture when you blow it up from the original tiny size. Greyman@wikia(Talk) 01:27, 23 May 2008 (UTC)