- The following discussion is preserved as an archive of a good article nomination that was successful. Please do not modify it.
Jesse[]
- Nominated by: JangFett (Talk) 01:52, March 23, 2010 (UTC)
- Nomination comments: It certainly has been a while since the last time I nommed a GAN. :P
(3 ACs/5 Users/8 Total)[]
Support
- Pre-nom review. Xicer9(Combadge) 02:04, March 23, 2010 (UTC)
- —fodigg (talk) | 19:00, March 29, 2010 (UTC)
- --Clone Commander Lee Talk 19:07, March 29, 2010 (UTC)
- —Master Jonathan(Jedi Council Chambers) 16:39, April 4, 2010 (UTC)
- Clean as...Jesse's head? :P -- 1358 (Talk) 18:15, April 7, 2010 (UTC)
- Cylka-talk- 21:21, April 8, 2010 (UTC)
- Chack Jadson (Talk) 20:28, April 13, 2010 (UTC)
- Jonjedigrandmaster (We seed the stars) 23:40, April 13, 2010 (UTC)
Object
- Attack of a clone (who doesn't know grammer)
P&T: Mention that he could fly a BARC Speeder.- I don't see its importance to mention. Mostly all troops can drive these. :P
- If you think so.
- I don't see its importance to mention. Mostly all troops can drive these. :P
BtS: Who voiced him ?- Addressed
Bio: I don't think Jesse alone shot down the commando droids.- It's not important to mention. Neither the episode or its guide even mentions that clone.
- Well, but it is incorrect that Kix and Hardcase stayed at Rex.
- It was Kix and Hardcase, though. If you take a look at the episode, you can briefly see their armor. Also, Kix informed Jesse of Rex's condition after he returned.
- Well, but it is incorrect that Kix and Hardcase stayed at Rex.
- It's not important to mention. Neither the episode or its guide even mentions that clone.
- That's all from me. Good work. Has he FA length? Clone Commander Lee Talk 19:39, March 23, 2010 (UTC)
- Thanks.
- Anytime.--Clone Commander Lee Talk 18:14, March 29, 2010 (UTC)
- From the Council Chambers:
"After Jesse, Kix, and Hardcase arrived near Kenobi's men,": "arrived near" is a bit awkward.Is there any way to expand the P&T a little more?- I double checked the episode, Jonathan, and I couldn't find any other information.
- OK, just wanted to make sure. —Master Jonathan(Jedi Council Chambers) 16:39, April 4, 2010 (UTC)
- I double checked the episode, Jonathan, and I couldn't find any other information.
- Otherwise, looks OK after a copy-edit. —Master Jonathan(Jedi Council Chambers) 22:49, March 30, 2010 (UTC)
- Thanks for the review, Jonathan. :)
- Cylka:
After landing on the planet, the Republic group spotted a crashed ship. Soon, Jesse, along with troopers Kix and Hardcase, went with Clone Captain CC-7567 to find abandoned escape pods. - Abandoned escape pods imply that they found empty escape pods. Was this the case? Also, were the escape pods from the crashed ship? Please clarify this.- Yes, they were abandoned. The latter objection is addressed.
droids overlooked the group and utilized a sniper rifle to fire at CC-7567. - the word overlooked doesn't work well in this case.- Addressed
I think that it would read better if you pipelinked Rex to CC-7567 and used the nickname Rex in the intro.- Addressed
He, like all clone troopers, was one of the many clones - This sounds a bit redundant. Please reword it.- Addressed
jettisoned onboard an escape pod from his starship - This sounds a bit awkward.- Addressed
In the intro you mention that Jesse and another clone destroyed the droids, but in the main body you only mention Jesse.- Yeah, I removed that clone from the body and forgot to remove him from the intro; the clone is not important to mention. Addressed.
Some of the sentences don't transition very well from one sentence to the next, especially in the main body. I feel that you use Jesse's name too often and that the sentences could be reworked a bit to eliminate that.- Addressed
Taking great concern for Rex's health, Jesse realized that they were on farmland, - What does one have to do with the other?- Addressed
IS it important that his armor had light blue markings? If yes, why?- I took this example from my Fil FA. :P If the "blue markings" doesn't seem right within the article, I will remove it.
- Not bad, Jang. Please take care of these things and I'll take another look. Cylka-talk- 02:01, April 4, 2010 (UTC)
- Thanks for the review, Cylka. :)
- The Grand Master
"Before the team departed, Rex gave Jesse the responsibility…" Why was the team departing?- Addressed
"Loyal" is a bit of a general/POV thing to say in the P/T, unless the source actually states him as such.- Yeah, I double checked the episode and couldn't find anything. The episode guide was also deemed worthless, so I removed it.
I don't have access to the episode, but can we say for sure how "polite" Jesse was in asking Suu's permission? Again, this is dangerously POV-soundingJonjedigrandmaster (We seed the stars) 01:29, April 10, 2010 (UTC)- I tried replacing it, but it didn't fit. Removed. Thanks for the review, Jonny. :)
Comments
Approved as a Good article by AgriCorps 23:40, April 13, 2010 (UTC)