- The following discussion is preserved as an archive of a good article nomination that was successful. Please do not modify it.
The Clone Wars: The Dreams of General Grievous[]
- Nominated by: JangFett Talk 16:12, 4 August 2009 (UTC)
- Nomination comments: Continuing the OOU TCW comic wave.
(3 ACs/2 Users/5 Total)[]
Support
- Kreivi Wolter 03:47, 5 August 2009 (UTC)
- —Master Jonathan(Jedi Council Chambers) 13:34, 6 August 2009 (UTC)
- Jonjedigrandmaster (Jedi Beacon) 16:24, September 5, 2009 (UTC)
- Chack Jadson (Talk) 15:33, September 7, 2009 (UTC)
- IFYLOFD (You will pay the price for your lack of vision!) 15:43, September 7, 2009 (UTC)
Object
- From the Council Chambers:
We can now link to individual pages of the webcomic, so please reference accordingly.- Otherwise, great job. —Master Jonathan(Jedi Council Chambers) 03:33, 5 August 2009 (UTC)
- Addressed. Thanks for the review Jonathan :)
- See my explanation under Transfer above. —Master Jonathan(Jedi Council Chambers) 06:17, 5 August 2009 (UTC)
- Should be good now Jonathan :)
- See my explanation under Transfer above. —Master Jonathan(Jedi Council Chambers) 06:17, 5 August 2009 (UTC)
- Addressed. Thanks for the review Jonathan :)
- Imagecat
Why is the Imagecat included twice in article?--Kreivi Wolter 21:38, 8 August 2009 (UTC)- Good catch :) The one in the app list is removed
- Nothing else to complain about. Good work.--Kreivi Wolter 19:37, 11 August 2009 (UTC)
- Good catch :) The one in the app list is removed
- The Grand Master
Watch for the tense shifting in the first two sentences of the intro.- Addressed
"However, he mentions that these are not dreams, but rather, dreams that happened in the past that continue to fade." They're dreams, but they're not dreams? Please word this a little more clearly.- Opps, addressed.
I can't find anything in the comic that says he murdered legends "for pleasure". Also, the comic mentions only that he's "slain kings", not "the leaders of many planets throught the galaxy."- See comment below
- Well, the point I'm trying to make here is that "slaying kings" isn't the same as slaying "leadears of planets throughout the galaxy" or murdering "kings throughout many worlds". For all we know, the "kings" he refers to could be from his own planet. Saying anything further is speculation/OR.
- Done.
- See comment below
A lot of the wording I'm seeing in the Plot Summary is taken straight out of the comic itself. Please reword it.- After rereading the comic, I was able to reword some but not all. It is a relativity small comic with little detail.
- I understand, but there's still a few phrases (i.e. "tastes failure") that have been taken pretty much directly out of the comic. If you can't find a good way to reword, just use a thesaurus and replace the words with synonyms. I'll give it another look once you finish with these :). Jonjedigrandmaster (Jedi Beacon) 14:54, 29 August 2009 (UTC)
- Okay :)
- After rereading the comic, I was able to reword some but not all. It is a relativity small comic with little detail.
"The droid alerts him that Count Dooku is trying to make contact with him, which will set up how Dooku contacted Grievous before he landed on the third moon of Vassek in "Lair of Grievous" " Is there any way that this could be worded more clearly? How is this setting up how Dooku contacted Grievous before Grievous landed? I'm not quite sure of the point you're trying to make.- Hope this helps.
The "Development" subsection is rather unnecessary, and should probably just be combined into the Bts.- Addressed
- Jonjedigrandmaster (Jedi Beacon) 21:06, 24 August 2009 (UTC)
- The Grand Master strikes back
You say: "He feels failure every time he looks back..." However, the comic implies that he has tasted failure recently, not before."But the new droid soldiers he now commands aren't as good compared to the ones he had in the past." In the comic, he doesn't compare how good they are, he just states that the soldiers he now commands are not the same as the soldiers of his past, in his dreams.- Jonjedigrandmaster (Jedi Beacon) 16:04, 29 August 2009 (UTC)
- Both addressed. Thanks, Jonny.
One more: "the comic was written by Pablo Hidalgo and illustrated and lettered by Katie Cook, Grant Gould, Tom Hodges, and Jeff Carlisle, with art drawn by Katie Cook." This reads the same in the intro and the bts; please vary it up a bit. Also, if it was illustrated by Katie Cook, then that makes the last bit "with art drawn by Katie Cook", pretty redundant, no?Jonjedigrandmaster (Jedi Beacon) 14:41, September 5, 2009 (UTC)- Yes, it does. Addressed.
- First part fixed, but it still reads redundantly in the BTS. Jonjedigrandmaster (Jedi Beacon) 15:28, September 5, 2009 (UTC)
- Oops, fixed. :)
- First part fixed, but it still reads redundantly in the BTS. Jonjedigrandmaster (Jedi Beacon) 15:28, September 5, 2009 (UTC)
- Yes, it does. Addressed.
Comments
- Could this image be used in the article?--Kreivi Wolter 10:19, 7 August 2009 (UTC)
- Due to the size of the article, it would be redundant. JangFett Talk 16:30, 11 August 2009 (UTC)
- Pity. Well, cant help.--Kreivi Wolter 19:37, 11 August 2009 (UTC)
- Due to the size of the article, it would be redundant. JangFett Talk 16:30, 11 August 2009 (UTC)
Approved as a Good article by AgriCorps 16:05, September 7, 2009 (UTC)