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Unidentified false JediEdit

  • Nominated by: Cevan IMPpress (talk) 20:55, February 4, 2017 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments: Here's hoping we get to see this full story someday.

(1 ACs/5 Users/6 Total)Edit

SupportEdit

  1. TanDivoInsignia-SenateMurders AnilSerifoglu (talk) 01:13, February 6, 2017 (UTC)
  2. Nice work; it can be difficult working with cut info. - Pyke syndicate AV-6R7Crew Pit 00:46, February 9, 2017 (UTC)
  3. Jedi Kasra ("Indeed.") 15:32, February 20, 2017 (UTC)
  4. --Lewisr (talk) 15:32, February 20, 2017 (UTC)
  5. Sol PacificusFirestorm 21:00, April 12, 2017 (UTC)
  6. ACvote Two-sentence GAs, woo-hoo...! Seriously, nice work though. Imperators II(Talk) 05:56, May 30, 2017 (UTC)

ObjectEdit

AnilSerifogluEdit
  • You can briefly mention the flashback scene in The Gathering, which was a nod to this story as Filoni said during the panel. TanDivoInsignia-SenateMurders AnilSerifoglu (talk) 01:39, February 5, 2017 (UTC)
AVEdit
  • IIRC, Dave Filoni talks about Latrans in The Complete S3s Zygerria featurette. Could you check that? - Pyke syndicate AV-6R7Crew Pit 01:16, February 6, 2017 (UTC)
    • Just checked, and he does indeed make mention of Latrans (not directly by name) in that featurette. Thanks for catching that, AV! I should have the information from there up a little later tonight. Cevan IMPpress (talk) 21:22, February 6, 2017 (UTC)
      • Sorry for the delay; I've added the featurette information into the article. Cevan IMPpress (talk) 22:20, February 7, 2017 (UTC)
Sol PacificusEdit
  • "Tano was no longer able to feel the Jedi as a whole through the Force, something she had been able to do since she was very young and credited with saving her life in her encounter with the false Jedi."
I actually found this sentence really hard to understand, especially coming from someone who is entirely unfamiliar with this character and the story. What is being credited? Ahsoka's ability to feel the Jedi through the Force? Her ability to sense the false Jedi? The false Jedi herself? I think the syntax might actually be a tiny bit off. Actually after reading it several more times, I think I understand it better; you mean to say that her ability to sense the Jedi had saved her life from this false Jedi, and this is perhaps the only reference to this character in the novel? I think it might help if you also clarified how feeling the Jedi as a whole through the Force helped save her life from this character or what it means to sense the Jedi as a whole, though I understand the information is probably very scarce. Anyways, is it possible for you to tweak this sentence a little bit to improve clarity? Sol PacificusFirestorm 08:02, April 4, 2017 (UTC)
Here's the full quote from the novel: "Even the sense of the Jedi as a whole was gone, and she'd been able to feel that since she was too small to articulate what it was that she felt. The feeling had saved her life once, when she was very young and a false Jedi came to Shili to enslave her."
This is the only mention of the false Jedi in Ahsoka (or any canon material for that matter), and we unfortunately do not know how Ahsoka sensing the Jedi as a whole saved her life here—I imagine she was able to sense that the false Jedi was merely posing as a Jedi, but adding that into the article would be speculative. If you'd still like me to do so, I can try and see about clearing that passage up in the article as best I can. Cevan IMPpress (talk) 20:46, April 7, 2017 (UTC)
I think I fixed the sentence. However, it might make more sense to write it from the false Jedi's perspective. That is, to state that the false Jedi had threatened Ahsoka's life, but that Ahsoka's ability to sense the Jedi as a whole had saved her life. That might help the confusion, but then again it might not because rewording it like that make the "sensing Jedi as a whole" sound even weirder. What do you think? Sol PacificusFirestorm 06:25, April 8, 2017 (UTC)
I've gone ahead and rewritten that part—how is it now? Cevan IMPpress (talk) 19:25, April 11, 2017 (UTC)
It's good. :) Sol PacificusFirestorm 21:00, April 12, 2017 (UTC)
Ecks DeeEdit
  • Check your image caption punctuation. Only full sentences should have a full stop. 1358 (Talk) 21:39, April 27, 2017 (UTC)
  • According to the MoS, the bolded name in the intro should not contain links. You should instead link the subjects at the next possible opportunity.
  • The Amazon and IMDb references both lack a backup link. Both templates should support adding them.
  • Using {{1stm}} {{Imo}} in the Sources would be better than a custom text. 1358 (Talk) 14:54, May 11, 2017 (UTC)
Imperators IIEdit
  • I'd like to see some indicator of the timeframe worked into the body, i.e., the false Jedi must've come to Shili at some point between the year of Tano's birth and the year of her joining the Order, right?
    • So sorry for the hold-up—I've been away without computer access for a bit. I've gone ahead and added this in now. Cevan IMPpress (talk) 21:45, May 29, 2017 (UTC)
  • So the link in ref 3 doesn't work.
  • "Filoni presumed that, due to the rarity of Force-sensitives in the galaxy, they would be highly sought after and some may attempt to kidnap them. The residents of Tano's town, having never met a Jedi before, would be none the wiser to Latrans's ruse." - could you reword this so that the IU parts are in past tense? Imperators II(Talk) 09:20, May 23, 2017 (UTC)

CommentsEdit

  • That's not an objection, but I have a minor suggestion. Maybe you can name Plo Koon's species, Kel Dor, somewhere in the article, considering the emphasis on his "creepy" and "sinister" appearance. TanDivoInsignia-SenateMurders AnilSerifoglu (talk) 01:39, February 5, 2017 (UTC)
    • I'm not sure if that's where you wanted it placed, but I've gone ahead and mentioned that Plo Koon is a Kel Dor. Cevan IMPpress (talk) 20:26, February 5, 2017 (UTC)
      • I would recommend somewhere in the line "creepy" and "sinister" appearance of Plo Koon, the story's hero. But it's just my personal preference, I'm fine with it anyway. The article looks great! TanDivoInsignia-SenateMurders AnilSerifoglu (talk) 01:13, February 6, 2017 (UTC)
        • Thanks! I'll try and mess around with it later and see if I can fit it in down there. If it doesn't work out, I'll leave it as is. Cevan IMPpress (talk) 21:22, February 6, 2017 (UTC)

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