- The following discussion is preserved as an archive of a good article nomination that was successful. Please do not modify it.
Wooley[]
- Nominated by: --Clone Commander Lee 17:32, 23 July 2009 (UTC)
- Nomination comments: A minor clone trooper from Innocents of Ryloth
(3 ACs/3 Users/6 Total)[]
Support
- —Master Jonathan(Jedi Council Chambers) 06:53, 26 July 2009 (UTC)
- JangFett Talk 17:20, 29 July 2009 (UTC)
- CC7567 (talk) 21:53, September 1, 2009 (UTC)
- Cavalier One(Squadron channel) 12:06, September 10, 2009 (UTC)
- --Kreivi Wolter 12:31, September 30, 2009 (UTC)
- Parts of this article's prose were confusing at best, so I've done what I could to reword certain portions to reflect more of Wooley's involvement rather than the overall events of the story. It would probably be a good idea for Lee and/or CC to double check to make sure everything is 100% factually accurate. Toprawa and Ralltiir 18:54, October 15, 2009 (UTC)
- Reviewed and double checed. Thank you very much, Toprawa. --Clone Commander Lee Talk 19:51, October 15, 2009 (UTC)
Object
- Fett
"Kenobi, Cody, Wooley and the rest of Ghost Company boarded the Crumb Bomber and other LAAT/i gunships and attempted to land in Nabat, but proton cannons attacked the Acclamator transports above, and Kenobi was tasked by Jedi Master Mace Windu with taking out the cannons to allow them to land." Run-on.- Fixed.
Lee, like your previous noms, please watch for underlinking and overlinking issues.- Fixed.
- No, I still see many unlinked subjects. droid, Nabat, Innocents of Ryloth are a couple of them.
- Fixed.
- No, I still see many unlinked subjects. droid, Nabat, Innocents of Ryloth are a couple of them.
- Fixed.
"Kenobi, Cody, Wooley and the rest of Ghost Company" Context on "Ghost Squadron".- Fixed
- It was not Wooley's unit. Ghost Squadron is a unit of 212th Attack Battalion.
- Fixed.
- It was not Wooley's unit. Ghost Squadron is a unit of 212th Attack Battalion.
- Fixed
"Ghost Company then settled up a base. Shortly after Cody went with Wooley, Waxer and Boil to scout ahead. Cody and Wooley went to investigate the courtyard, and discovered that the Twi'leks were being held prisoner." Very choppy, also the first two sentences are fragments.- Fixed
- Read this Lee: "Ghost Company then settled up a base and shortly after Cody went with Wooley, Waxer and Boil to scout ahead." Improper English. Make sure you proofread what you write, and if it helps, read it out loud. Or it could be your use of punctuation that confuses the reader. I'll correct this sentence, but in the future, you should be able to correct your usage of proper punctuation. More specially: commas, semi-colons, and &mdash (—), which is used in place of commas sometimes.
- Lee, please rewatch the episode and find where they "scouted ahead". "Ghost Company then settled up a base and shortly after Cody went with Wooley, Waxer, and Boil to scout ahead."
- Fixed.
- Lee, please rewatch the episode and find where they "scouted ahead". "Ghost Company then settled up a base and shortly after Cody went with Wooley, Waxer, and Boil to scout ahead."
- Read this Lee: "Ghost Company then settled up a base and shortly after Cody went with Wooley, Waxer and Boil to scout ahead." Improper English. Make sure you proofread what you write, and if it helps, read it out loud. Or it could be your use of punctuation that confuses the reader. I'll correct this sentence, but in the future, you should be able to correct your usage of proper punctuation. More specially: commas, semi-colons, and &mdash (—), which is used in place of commas sometimes.
- Fixed
"After reporting their findings back to Kenobi and Windu, they moved out." Moved out where?- Fixed.
Lee, try and use translating words such as "soon", "then", "however", "though" in your sentences. Go back and correct this issue because it is difficult to understand what's happening chronologically.- Fixed.
- Along with the proofreading, double check to make sure your sentences flow together.
- Checked.
- Along with the proofreading, double check to make sure your sentences flow together.
- Fixed.
"After they freed Twi'leks attacked tactical droid commander TX-20, the Separatists in Nabat were defeated, and after the transports landed, the army headed to the capital city of Lessu succesfully reteaking the capital and winning the battle." Improper English, also they did not win the battle. Kenobi and his men destroyed the cannons, allowing Windu and his men land and organize for their run on the capital.- Fixed.
- What is the "army of Windu"? More specifically, you should say Lightning Squadron and Windu.
- Fixed.
- What is the "army of Windu"? More specifically, you should say Lightning Squadron and Windu.
- Fixed.
It is not confirmed that all clone troopers were born in 32 BBY. Their homeworld is Kamino, though unless you can prove that Wooley was born in 32 BBY, please remove it.- Removed.
Lee, I strongly recommend that you go back and proofread this article because I corrected a lot of grammatical issues, spelling, and linking issues.- Fixed.
Only use {{Ref|}} tags in the infobox, not in the main article.- Sourced.
- JangFett Talk 00:58, 24 July 2009 (UTC)
- Fixed. Thanks for the review Jang. --Clone Commander Lee 12:22, 24 July 2009 (UTC)
- From the Council Chambers:
"After they freed Twi'leks attacked tactical droid commander TX-20,": Slightly confusing; I'm not quite sure what you're trying to say here.- Cleared.
Can you split the last paragraph of the bio into two or three separate ones?- Splitted.
The BTS needs a little expansion, primarily context on "Innocents of Ryloth".- Expanded.
- Otherwise looks good after a copyedit and some ref cleanup. —Master Jonathan(Jedi Council Chambers) 03:48, 26 July 2009 (UTC)
- Got them all. Thanks for the review Master Jonathan. --Clone Commander Lee 06:39, 26 July 2009 (UTC)
- Fett II
"Then, Cody and the Company created a diversion, while Kenobi, Waxer, and Boil freed the prisoners and also managed to take out the rest of the proton cannons." This sentence needs clarifying. What was the diversion?- Cleared.
- Good work Lee JangFett Talk 16:58, 29 July 2009 (UTC)
- Fixed. Thanks for the review Jang. --Clone Commander Lee 17:07, 29 July 2009 (UTC)
- Attack of the Clone
- While I would normally correct these myself, I feel that addressing these objections will help you learn the expectations of a GA.
"After reporting their findings back to Kenobi and Mace Windu, they moved out." Who was Windu? Who were "they"?Everything after that sentence in the intro lacks coherency, and there's too much detail not related to Wooley. Please try to reword and shorten it.- Shortened.
Please watch linking, especially to redirects. This is something that you can fix yourself.- Adressed.
Ghost Company comes out of nowhere in the body and is not clarified in relation to Wooley.The episode did not give the slightest hint that the events took place in 22 BBY. Please put the correct source in.- Sourced.
"Ghost Company then settled up a base and shortly after Cody went with Wooley, Waxer, and Boil to scout ahead the city of Nabat. Then Cody and Wooley went to investigate the courtyard and discovered that the Twi'leks were being held prisoner." This is still improper English; "settled up" is not an existing idiom, and furthermore, the rest of the phrase is extremely choppy. Please reword this.- Fixed.
- They didn't "build" a base; that would mean constructing one and literally building it. They can establish a base. Furthermore, the first sentence is cut off too soon with nothing to satisfy your "shortly after". You need another independent clause in that sentence to fix it CC7567 (talk) 20:05, 5 August 2009 (UTC)
- Fixed.
"After reporting their findings to Kenobi and Windu, they moved out to the village. However, they were attacked by gutkurrs, released by tactical droid TX-20, the commander of the Confederate forces stationed in Nabat. Kenobi managed to lure them into an alley with the Force": this whole time, I have no idea who "they" refers to.- Fixed.
Context needed for the gutkurrs. What were they?"Then, Cody and the Company created a diversion by attacking the droids, while Kenobi, Waxer, and Boil freed the prisoners and also managed to take out the rest of the proton cannons." There's a lack of flow and an unneeded sense of chronology here. Please reword."When the tactical droid commander was about to shot Kenobi": please reread this and try to change what you find. It's improper English and lacks good sentence flow.- Fixed.
The first two sentences of the P&T have no verifiability with their current wording and need more clarification. Furthermore, please proofread the last sentence and try to reword it.- Fixed.
- This still remains. How, specifically, was Wooley shown to be one of the best scouts when Cody picked them? If this is true, then anyone Cody picks for scouting is the best, and the reader has no clue why. Furthermore, the last sentence still lacks good flow. CC7567 (talk) 20:05, 5 August 2009 (UTC)
- Fixed.
- Lee, this still does not work. What was Kenobi's exact quote and order to Cody for scouting ahead? Until you can clarify this in the article, that part of the P&T remains speculation. Furthermore, I've just gone ahead and fixed the last sentence for you. CC7567 (talk) 19:28, 6 August 2009 (UTC)
- Fixed. --Clone Commander Lee 10:41, 10 August 2009 (UTC)
- Lee, putting the quote in the P&T does absolutely nothing. I'm asking you to clarify this in the text of the P&T, not provide a quote and still not relate it to the P&T. When I say "clarify it in the article", that means relate it back to your own words, not simply provide the lines from the episode and do nothing with it. CC7567 (talk) 22:12, 10 August 2009 (UTC)
- Sorry, CC. I don't really understand this objection. --Clone Commander Lee 07:25, 11 August 2009 (UTC)
- Here's what I'm asking: How do we know that because Cody picked him, he was "one of the best"? Your P&T does nothing to satisfy or clarify this, and the current wording means that anyone Cody picks to scout is immediately one of the best. CC7567 (talk) 22:45, 11 August 2009 (UTC)
- Better now ?--Clone Commander Lee 11:04, 12 August 2009 (UTC)
- I still fail to see how the P&T quote is still relevant. Either remove it or relate it to Wooley in the caption. CC7567 (talk) 20:22, 12 August 2009 (UTC)
- Removed. --SUBST:User:Clone Commander Lee/sig 20:49, 12 August 2009 (UTC)
- I still fail to see how the P&T quote is still relevant. Either remove it or relate it to Wooley in the caption. CC7567 (talk) 20:22, 12 August 2009 (UTC)
- Better now ?--Clone Commander Lee 11:04, 12 August 2009 (UTC)
- Here's what I'm asking: How do we know that because Cody picked him, he was "one of the best"? Your P&T does nothing to satisfy or clarify this, and the current wording means that anyone Cody picks to scout is immediately one of the best. CC7567 (talk) 22:45, 11 August 2009 (UTC)
- Sorry, CC. I don't really understand this objection. --Clone Commander Lee 07:25, 11 August 2009 (UTC)
- Lee, putting the quote in the P&T does absolutely nothing. I'm asking you to clarify this in the text of the P&T, not provide a quote and still not relate it to the P&T. When I say "clarify it in the article", that means relate it back to your own words, not simply provide the lines from the episode and do nothing with it. CC7567 (talk) 22:12, 10 August 2009 (UTC)
- Fixed. --Clone Commander Lee 10:41, 10 August 2009 (UTC)
- Lee, this still does not work. What was Kenobi's exact quote and order to Cody for scouting ahead? Until you can clarify this in the article, that part of the P&T remains speculation. Furthermore, I've just gone ahead and fixed the last sentence for you. CC7567 (talk) 19:28, 6 August 2009 (UTC)
- Fixed.
- This still remains. How, specifically, was Wooley shown to be one of the best scouts when Cody picked them? If this is true, then anyone Cody picks for scouting is the best, and the reader has no clue why. Furthermore, the last sentence still lacks good flow. CC7567 (talk) 20:05, 5 August 2009 (UTC)
- Fixed.
- For future reference, you cannot "make someone able" to do something. You're better off with replacing it with "allowing" or "allowed". CC7567 (talk) 06:52, 5 August 2009 (UTC)
- Should got them. Thanks for the review, CC. --Clone Commander Lee 18:11, 5 August 2009 (UTC)
- Take two. --Clone Commander Lee 09:28, 6 August 2009 (UTC)
- Should got them. Thanks for the review, CC. --Clone Commander Lee 18:11, 5 August 2009 (UTC)
"General Anakin Skywalker and his Padawan, Commander Ahsoka Tano, were able to destroy the Separatist blockade surrounding the planet, allowing the ground invasion forces to land." They didn't land if Ghost Company had to later clear the Separatist forces in Nabat. Please check your facts.CC7567 (talk) 20:26, 31 August 2009 (UTC)- Fixed and thanks. --Clone Commander Lee Talk 19:16, September 1, 2009 (UTC)
- Graestan:
[[:File:Wooley.jpg]] looks the same with my glasses on or off. Please re-capture a more clear version.- Added by JMAS.
- No improvement. Graestan(Talk) 17:30, September 9, 2009 (UTC)
- Won't get any better version. --Clone Commander Lee Talk 14:42, September 10, 2009 (UTC)
- This objection is not fixed. Graestan(Talk) 02:23, September 30, 2009 (UTC)
- As the one who took this screenshot, you can't get any clearer. This was the clearest one out of several frames before and after this. Also, it's the only one that doesn't have some sort of obstruction in front of him. - JMAS Hey, it's me! 17:05, September 30, 2009 (UTC)
- This objection is not fixed. Graestan(Talk) 02:23, September 30, 2009 (UTC)
- Won't get any better version. --Clone Commander Lee Talk 14:42, September 10, 2009 (UTC)
- No improvement. Graestan(Talk) 17:30, September 9, 2009 (UTC)
- Added by JMAS.
[[:File:Cody and Wooley.jpg]] has a watermark of some sort on it. Please remove.- Added by JMAS.
Mention should be made in the intro as well as the biography that Windu was contacted by holograph; as it stands it reads like he was on the planet and up in the ships.- Fixed.
"Wooley expressed his hesitation with the mission's success" – Not sure if this means he was hesitant to complete the mission, i.e. he had misgivings, or he had doubts that it would be successful, i.e. he was being pessimistic. Please clarify.- Changed.
- Graestan(Talk) 12:48, September 2, 2009 (UTC)
- Thanks for the review. --Clone Commander Lee Talk 14:50, September 2, 2009 (UTC)
- Objection(s) overridden by AgriCorps 21:11, October 14, 2009 (UTC)
- Thanks for the review. --Clone Commander Lee Talk 14:50, September 2, 2009 (UTC)
Comments
Approved as a Good article by AgriCorps 18:54, October 15, 2009 (UTC)
- Are you still planning to do a second review of him, CC ? --Clone Commander Lee Talk 14:46, 26 August 2009 (UTC)