Z9 should also be affiliated with the Republic Military, so that should be added to the infobox, etc.
Done. In case anyone should ask, the "military" in "Republic military" is lowercase because, despite the page it links to being uppercase, whoever made that page was in error and it has yet to be uppercase in canon. Cevan(talk) 13:40, November 30, 2016 (UTC)
Some preliminary objections before I look at the prose itself. The references for the droid's height are inadequate as is. Z9 is not mentioned in any of the Databank entries, so you'll need to include a note about how you reached the conclusion. Essentially the exact same objection as Toprawa's objection in the nomination above yours.
IIRC there's a category for droids by programmed gender.1358(Talk) 17:05, May 11, 2017 (UTC)
Not sure how I missed that—added. Cevan(talk) 00:19, May 12, 2017 (UTC)
"Z9 was aboard the space station Valor along with Tarkin shortly before the Republic strategy conference on board the station was set to begin." Two -boards in the same sentence. Please vary your usage; personally I'd swap the first one with "present on".
The last sentence of the intro reads awkwardly, and I think the reason is the "while". Quoting the style guide of The Economist, "while" is best reserved for time-related usage. Please try to reword the sentence for better flow.
Still sounding a bit choppy. My recommendation would be something like "The Separatist plan to ram the Valor with the cruiser was foiled after a Republic squad managed to detonate the incoming ship, saving Valor and…"
Piggybacking my first objection, there's too many "aboards/on boards" in the body. Please vary.