The following discussion is preserved as an archive of a reduxed featured article. The result of the discussion was Featured article status lost. Please do not modify the page.

Warb NullEdit

• Redux comments: Sent to Redux per Meeting 42. Tommy9281 took care of some issues and rewrote enough of the article that he recommended it be taken here.
• Date added: June 18, 2011

(+0)Edit

Support

Object

1. Kreivi
   • The bio and the p&t still needs the information from here. Kreivi Wolter 11:17, June 26, 2011 (UTC)
     • Addressed.—Tommy 9281 Sunday, June 26, 2011, 11:35 UTC
2. Toprawa:
   • Might I suggest an expansion of the intro? Relative to the rest of the body, it just seems kind of skimpy right now. Would like to see it beefed up a little bit more. Toprawa and Ralltiir 19:55, July 26, 2011 (UTC)
     • I dunno, it looks proportionate to me. I figure adding any more will be giving too much detail for an intro. If you feel strongly though I'll try and add something.—Tommy 9281 Thursday, September 1, 2011, 08:43 UTC
   • Please reload infobox. You could kill the redirect links too while you're in there. Toprawa and Ralltiir 22:46, January 12, 2012 (UTC)
     • Infobox reloaded, though I don't see any redirect links for anything in it. Please specify, thanks.—Tommy 9281 Saturday, March 3, 2012, 22:50 UTC
       • There were two. I fixed them. Toprawa and Ralltiir 07:26, March 4, 2012 (UTC)

• Assuming the mention of Onderon being in the Inner Rim cannot be sourced to that paragraph's citation, one will need to be provided for this geographical location: "Shas Dovos was a Human male born on the Inner Rim planet Onderon..."
• I replaced the external Wikipedia link to metallurgy with a redlink in both the intro and the biography. If it's important enough to link to, we might as well create our own article for it. Please kill the corresponding redlink.
• The article alternates between the possessive forms "Donos'" and "Donos's." Please determine which is correct and use that one throughout.
• The article also alternates between capitalizing and not capitalizing "groundborer." Please determine one.
• Regarding this mention of the battle, does any source actually canonically apply the name "Battle of Onderon" as a formal title? I'm guessing no, judging by the article's current title (First Battle of Onderon (Naddist Uprising)). If no, the article should avoid referring to this as if it is a formal title. Simple de-capitalizing "Battle" would suffice: "During the Battle of Onderon in the Freedon Nadd Uprising..."
• One of the most frivolous things writers tend to stick into P/T sections is saying how a character is "brave" for doing something, often with no canonical evidence at all to back this up. Simply by fighting in a battle, for example, we consider someone to be brave, and thus we manufacture for ourselves artificial P/T filler material. This article's P/T twice makes mention of Null's supposed bravery because he fought in the Onderon battle, although the P/A section later says he has "no discernible thoughts or emotions." If a source does not actually attribute bravery to his thought process in these moments, I would strongly suggest removing mention of this word and simply stating what he did without trying to contrive some unattributed personality for him.
• Piggybacking off the objection preceding this one, the fact that he essentially has no personality, according to that line from the P/A, as his Warb Null persona is something that definitely needs to be mentioned in the P/T, but is not currently.
• The P/A suddenly capitalizes "Spirit protector" after referring to it as "spirit protector" in all preceding mentions. Please determine one.
• As the term "blacksmith" is apparently canonically attributed to this character, I feel like this should be mentioned/linked at some point within the article.
• Please consider inserting a paragraph break at some point in the third paragraph of the "Early life" biography subsection. Toprawa and Ralltiir 08:38, March 4, 2012 (UTC)

Comments

• Given the amount there's information regarding them, I think the article could include Equipment-section. Some info from p&a could be moved there. Kreivi Wolter 12:15, June 26, 2011 (UTC)
• Given the two {{Sofixit}} edits you just made that totally could have been done in the first place, feel free to take care of this under that same premise.—Tommy 9281 Sunday, June 26, 2011, 12:20 UTC

Vote to remove article's FA status (Inq only)

Unaddressed objection for over a month. CC7567 ^(talk) 05:48, September 1, 2011 (UTC)

1. Five-month old objections. Might as well get rid of it now and ease the transition over to the FAN page. Menkooroo (talk) 19:25, July 30, 2012 (UTC)
2. It's been long enough. Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 20:26, July 30, 2012 (UTC)
3. —Cal Jedi ^{(Personal Comm Channel)} 20:36, July 30, 2012 (UTC)